A Thought on Cougars

A discussion has started up on a website I write for called wellcultured.com.  Kirk, the administrator of well cultured wanted to start a discussion based on the sexual adventures of 30 yr old to 40 yr old women.  The article questions the moral integrity of the so called "cougar lifestyle."  

From the site:

The term “Cougar” has become more popular as of recent due to the movie Oceans 13, but it has been around for quite a while- as older women seek younger men. The fact of the matter is, so far as sexual maturity is concerned, the “theory” (or the supposed “science”) is that women are in their sexual prime much later than men, though obviously their childbearing years are much earlier. Men are supposed to be at their prime in their mid-20s, whereas women at their 30s+, and so-on.

I agree that women do come into their sexual prime at a later stage in life than men do.  I am not one hundred percent of the physiology of it all, but most women seem to desire sex more later in their life.  This physical drive for sex is very apparent especially in marriages where the woman desires sex but the man doesn't.  Hence, this would explain why you would see a lot of older women out at bars.  

I would not totally shun that lifestyle because people can have sex with who they want, when they want and for whatever reason.  The only thing I really would shy away from as if it were the black death would be if the woman was in a marriage.  Unfaithful people never seem to make it out in one piece.  If I were put into that situation, I wouldn't accept the sex no matter how attractive the woman was.

Now, a comment was made by a woman who visited well cultured and she was a bit extremist about it.

How about starting off by not referring to older women that date younger men as cougars..it is sexist and rude. Are you aware that there is no equivalent name for men that date younger women. This labeling is yet another attempt to control female sexuality and construct women as less than. As the question about age and dating but it can be done without resorting to demeaning labels.

The term "cougar" has been around for what seems like decades.  The earliest known cougar in my mind is the woman who played the dean's wife in "Animal House."  I don't know if the term was used outright, but the woman almost seems empowered by her ability to seduce a young college student.  

The article itself isn't meant to use the word "cougar" as a derogatory term.  It's simply a word used to describe a certain lifestyle.  The word isn't used to spite the women who have sex with younger men.  In my opinion, I believe that this poster simply saw the word "cougar" and then felt the urge to stand upon a soap box.  The article was simply written to spur a discussion on whether women should pick up younger men or not.  This isn't a "Maxim" type of site where guys can go to compare notches on their bedposts.  

/rant